When I was in high school, I only dated one guy named Chris. He was truly a trooper. We met in 9th grade, and his locker was next to my best friend's locker. We would always exchange a smile, but never spoke a word to each other until the last day of 9th grade. We had a 7 minute passing period between classes, and right as I was about to walk in the door for my last class, I heard my name shouted from behind me. I turned around and Chris was right there. He then asked me for my phone number "so we can keep in touch over the summer." And because it was the last day of school, everyone had their yearbook on them. So, I told him that he could have my number. I literally wrote: Sarcastical Girl: 555-5555 (for example). I didn't say hi, nice knowin' you or anything. And of course, we were both so awkward at 13, I literally handed him his yearbook back, and said "ok bye."
I didn't hear back from him for about 2 months. He called me one afternoon, and since that phone call, we dated for about 4 years. Go figure. He was truly a wonderful dude.
Anywho, let's go to the real story. In high school, both Chris and I were pretty busy. We both had extra curricular activities in the fine arts, and had practice during and after school. I also was busy every Saturday, and worked on Sundays. So the only times we saw each other than inside the classrooms were on Saturday night dates. Usually we went to the movies. For both of us, we didn't get our license for a loooooong time, so our poor mothers had to shuttle us to and from the dates. (sorry, mom).
Anywho, we usually decided to go to the movies because it was cheap (back in the day) and there was a Barnes and Nobles nearby. We would definitely frequent B&N and be nerds and read books. Trust me, we were an old married couple at the age of 16.
Even though we dated for such a long ass time, we never had sex. I know, the poor man. Dating a chick for four years and she never gave it up. I've talked to Chris several times about this after our breakup (years later) and he told me that he was SO stoked to have a girlfriend in high school, because that usually meant that you got laid, but since I never felt ready, he was like damn. He hoped that SOMEDAY he would get to nail me. Now people, he is not a perv. He said this in a jokingly way. And it's true! Nowadays, people sleep together within their first several months of getting to know each other. Giving up your v-card at a young age is NORMAL. However, because I was paranoid of getting pregnant, as well as seeing my sister get her heart broken by the first guy she slept with, I was more than willing to wait.
So I was pretty much the most naive person ever when it came to sex or anything on the topic as a teen. I knew everything about STDs and protection, but knew nothing about actual contact with a person of the opposite sex. Some questions I often asked myself were: Don't people get embarrassed? How do you look your partner in the eye, after having sex? Are you supposed to cuddle afterwards? What if it hurts? Should I act like it's not a big deal? What if it hurts A LOT? What if the condom breaks? TRUST ME the questions went on and on. For days.
My dating experience with Chris, were close to only kissing and hugging. I was too afraid of getting preggers, so we were limited to major makeout sessions in the back row of movie theaters. He was an EXCELLENT kisser, probably from much practice with me. The poor man.
So one particular Saturday night, Chris and I went to a movie as normal. We put the arm rest up and out of our way, so we could hold hands easily and snuggle. Well, as we were holding hands, they somehow migrated to his right leg. It took me a few seconds to think about it, so I whispered to Chris during the movie:
Sarcastical Girl: Your wallet is in the way, can you take it out of your pocket? Jesus Christ, what is it made of, metal???
Chris: Ummm I can't move it. It's my....non....wallet.....
Sarastical Girl's Inside Thoughts: HOLY HELL, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME. I AM SO EMBARRASSED. GOOD THING THIS ROOM IS DARK, MY FACE IS GETTING HOT.
Chris had the most majorest hardest boner I have ever seen,well felt, to this day. And it's a damn shame we never had sex, especially since he was packin.
Another little gem of a story that completes me.
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